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Whose Fault Is it? Why Do We Get Triggered?

Updated: May 23, 2020

How many times in a day do you get #triggered by trivial things. Things that you won't remember by the end of the day let alone in a year -or worse: you dwell on it, have a cup of coffee and complain about it to your friend or coworker. How many times have you put energy where you add to negativity and fuel the issue at hand? The questions posed here are not meant to make you feel bad or guilty, they are merely a reminder of what is important, what matters.

If in relationships you constantly see shortcomings of your partner, family, friends - this can be your warning sign that perhaps you are not happy with yourself, you aren't content with your life. When we are not happy and have no peace within we are more likely to look outside for the cause or a blame for our discomfort than to go within and do the work. We often try to go the easy way. More often than not, the easy way now is the hard way in the long term. You've heard many successful people say: "Feel the fear and do it anyway." Well dear friends, that's it! That is the small but important key to success, happiness, and content in life.

If you cannot change a situation, you always have a choice. You either remove yourself from it, you do something about it, you talk to someone and make a difference or ... you can insert your own creative answer here. Instead of getting into a conflict in a situation -stand in love and offer compassion. You might learn why the other person did what triggered you and it might offer an explanation that might even surprise you: perhaps they never meant to hurt you; yet you got hurt because your #expectations or needs weren't met. Whose responsibility is it to meet your expectations and your needs? Unless you are a minor the answer would be your parents; otherwise it is of the person looking at you in the mirror.

Sometimes we get triggered by things that are part of what's important and what matter to us, and even then we have a choice of how we are going to deal with it. Will you be empowered in your actions and stay true to your values or will you do or say something at the expense of someone or something else just to get things your way.

When looking at your life, your circumstance ask yourself: will this matter in five or ten years from now? If yes than you might as well do something about it and stand your ground; if not, perhaps it's your turn to be a bigger person and let this one go.

If this writing got you triggered, ask yourself why? Is it worth it? A heart full of #gratitude brings content and happiness. Perhaps you could start there. Add a spoonful of gratitude to your morning coffee, and sprinkle it throughout the day. Be generous with it. Look for the smallest things to be grateful for and they will grow into bigger things. Then you will feel your self-worth and with that energy and strength you will gain the courage to start working on yourself and your life without blame, shame or fear. Where attention goes, energy flows. Next time when the trigger happens, instead of looking for all the things that are wrong, start creating. Create that which you want to have in your life and be whom you want to be, then you will see the magic unfold as you experience your life in a whole new and beautiful way.

Always in the HeART,

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